Who Should (Not) Read This Blog and Why

Who Should Read It:

  • Anyone who has bruised their septum from picking their nose too hard
  • Anyone with two nipples

Who Should Not Read It:

  • Anyone who is overly sensitive, especially to the words hell, damn, and fart
  • Females who’ve been the object of a past obsession
  • Anyone with two hairy nipples

Reasons Why You Should Read It:

  1. “It will make a turd.” A friend used to say this about food that was average, but not overly objectionable.  Comedically speaking, I hope this blog will give you at least a semi-solid chuckle.
  2. To answer Elvis Costello’s question, I’ll tell you exactly what’s so funny ’bout peace, love, and understanding.  There’s plenty of room for the serious, the spiritual, and the suffocating and bloviating political.  But in this space, anyone who expects me to act like an adult can stuff it.
  3. It’s way bigger than a breadbox.  I’ve done and said enough childish things to keep me writing for years, and the material never ends.
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